I had posted this on the Spearhead once, but I want to revisit this in a little more detail now that I have a venue of my own. You see, allow me to venture back in time to when I was 26 years old.....
So here I am, 26 years young, with an emergency fulltime job that I dropped into and a part-time job at a bar to help with the payments. In all honesty, I was making low 5 figures with my full time job, but I was making $360 each weekend at the bar. All in all, it wasn't too bad for an undiagnosed ADHD dude just flittering along in life with his parents.
However that was the deal, I was 26 years old and still living with my parents. Sure, at the bar I would catch some ladies giving me the eye, but where was I going to take them? Then the plan was set in motion; it was time for Omnipitron to get his own digs!!
I started buying things I needed, cutlery, plates, cooking pans and the like you name it. I did splurge and buy a ridiculously expensive cookware set (1800 CAD), but I wanted one that would last a good long time (still in use after 9 years too.)
I had to have a television, so I bought a 32-inch flat screen 'normal’ television, and a DVD home theatre with 6 speakers and a subwoofer. That purchase was roughly 1,000 CAD. I bought an entertainment center to house my electronics for roughly $200.
So, I needed some furniture, but I refused to go and buy brand new (now that the important stuff was purchased) because I, like most guys, just need something to function, Martha Stewart need not apply.
I spoke to a friend at the bar about my plans and lo and behold we could help each other out. She had a sectional couch that I could have for FREE so long as I took it out of her house. I did with my younger bro’s help, and there where bonuses, oh yes. A coffee table, and two chests of drawers also for the heavy duty price of free. From my friend I happened to grab a free table and chair set for my 'breakfast nook'. Ah, nothing better than free right?
Now I was in business.
So I move into my new digs with plenty of money to spare between my two jobs and with my tiny little Japanese Import, I was set. I didn't bother with cable as I watched movies or played games on my computer, and between my jobs, I didn't need too much anyway.
Now, here is where I want you to pay attention. I had met my soon to be wife actually 2 months before I moved out. We where only dating at the time so moving in with her was out of the question, however, soon I did. Before this happened, her washing machine broke, I replaced it (400 CAD).
I moved in with her and my furniture was disposed of or given away, we didn't need it.
We (meaning I) bought a new bedroom set and a new mattress, which of course isn't cheap ($800 CAD). As time went on, of course mostly I purchased a new couch and chair ($1,600 CAD).
As time went on my little Japanese car got far too small to cart the family around. I also live in a relatively snowy area in Ontario so I made the choice to upgrade to a 4x4 pickup truck (do I need to state the price?).
We of course got married shortly after that, pretty standard affair, cost roughly $20,000 CAD.
As a Christmas gift, my wife got a surprise curio cabinet ($1000), which wasn't cheap. One of the kiddo's also got a new bedroom set, ($1,400) I went halfsies on that.
I was diagnosed with ADHD about 3 years ago, and sometimes, life could get hard. The company I work for has undergone some drastic (and sorely needed) culture changes since I started working there 11 years ago. Many a day I came home and simply wanted to hang it up due to the ever-increasing demands. I stick it out simply because that not many other options will pay the equivalent.
Then, Mrs. Omni and I realized the "Canadian" Dream, we bought a place of our own (well, we will once we buy it from the bank) but it sorely needed some renovations...thank heavens we bought a truck. It did save my ass many a time.
Soon, as the kids started to sprout, I realized that the cab of my truck was going to be too small for the future, what was my choice, of course, another truck with a bigger cab (more expensive than the last, okay?).
So, what is the point of all of this? Simple, at this stage of my life, I'm a 35 year old, married ‘homeowner’ with two dependants. What would have happened if I chose to remain single in terms of my financial outlay?
Would I have stayed in my apartment?
In fact, I was thinking about DOWNgrading from my one bedroom into a bachelor, as there was more space than I really needed.
Would I have kept my tiny Japanese run-about?
Yup, much cheaper than two large V-8 trucks no?
Would I have bought all that furniture?
Nope, I already had some of it for years beforehand and I would have had no reason to get rid of it unless they broke. Most men are like this.
Would I have quit my 'demanding' job?
Yup, I could work in a warehouse and still have paid my nominal bills.
Think about the taxes that a 35 year old me pays as opposed to 26 year old me? Property taxes, even sales taxes on things like gas, maintenance, and building supplies for our house. I make close to mid 5 figures now that I have been with the company so long, would that happen if I had decided to work in a warehouse or mass market retail? How much tax could Stephen Harper expect from me then? Didn't pay those in the apartment I can tell you that!!
I had to get my brakes done, a transmission flush, and an oil change on the import and it cost me $800, for my first truck all of that PLUS the diff fluid (it has two since it's a 4x4) and transfer case cost almost $2000.
Think about the money, which has been (and will continue) to be dumped into the economy simply due to deciding to enter into a monogamous relationship with a woman.
No, I'm not made of money nor is it some way to brag about what I've got, and I'll be the first to say that what I've done is nowhere near special, many men and even a few women make similar choices every single day.
The amazing thing I wish to point out is just how little a man can live off of when he decides to be single. Ladies, you have no idea of just how much a man takes on when he decides that you are ‘worth it’.
At the end of the day, with so many men choosing to remain single for longer, or chooses to remain single for the rest of his life, the contribution to the economy that is lost is phenomenal, whether women see this or not is irrelevant. It’s in everyone’s best interest for a man to marry; it supports the economy in ways that many don’t even fathom which maintains that thing we call civilization!!
Maybe…just maybe Hanna Rosin is wrong? Too bad many will realize this far too late. Keep this in mind men when women say that men contribute nothing to coupledom. Seriously, we contribute much more than we realize!!!!